Toddlers Are Insecure About Your Love Too!

Before kids develop language, they use different ways to communicate their needs and wants to us. Often, this looks like crying or whining, which can be hard to understand or accept at times. Perhaps a child that is highly insecure about their place in your heart, may resort to different behaviours to validate your love to them. This could show up in a myriad of ways, such as: 

• Consistently asking to be carried, even when they’re perfectly capable of walking 

• Asking for kisses, often  

• Clinging to your body, never leaving your side 

• Whining for no reason

• Becoming weepy and crying 

• Asking for cuddles consistently, often 

While some of these behaviours are considered ‘bad’ and others are ‘good’ and even nice ways to connect with your toddlers, they are also tell-tell signs that there’s a deeper underlying insecurity within them that needs to be addressed. 

And from their perspective, not having full use of language and the ability to name emotions, they resort to these methods as a cry for support. 

So next time your toddler is exhibiting these behaviours - stop, and consider what’s the feeling behind the action and most importantly, why are these feelings there? Perhaps there’s been stress or tension in the home, or simply a lot of change has happened in their routine, causing them to feel uncertain and unhinged. 

So as we head into summer vacations, and break away from our daily routine, consider that these changes may bring about uncertainty in your toddler, and could show up as these behaviours. 

What to do? Simply being aware of what's driving this behaviour is enough to be able to lean into your child’s needs with gentleness, patience and reassurance.